lezbemoms

Raising a Blended Family

Operation Pretend To Not Be Pregnant

on December 22, 2014

…has now commenced.

My parents and brother are less than an hour away from the house and will be with us for the duration of the holiday. As you know, we will be telling them about Link on Christmas morning… Which gives Shorty a whole three days plus half of Christmas morning to make like a nonpregnant woman.

This isn’t going to be easy. This pregnancy has so many textbook symptoms that are making themselves Known, with a capital K! Symptoms such as:

-Extreme exhaustion. Shorty is soooo tired all the time! She works eight hour days, comes home, naps, eats* dinner, and goes right back to bed at toddler bedtime- which is 7pm! Seriously, the latest she’s gone to bed all week was tonight and she managed to stay up until nine o’clock because we had to get the house ready for our family- and that was seriously a struggle. Poor lady is tired!

-Not-just-morning sickness. We have officially moved well beyond only having seen a “few” episodes of sickness; it has become a regular unwelcome part of Shorty’s routine. So many things make her sick! Smells, thoughts of certain foods she finds repulsive at that particular moment, brushing her teeth… It comes and goes at infrequent and unannounced intervals; hiding it for three days is going to be a challenge!

-*Eating. Or, lack thereof. Appetite is lagging. When Link is hungry, s/he only wants spicy foods… And cream of wheat. Random, much?

-huge boobs. Simply ginormous. She’s moved up two cup sizes already! I’m quite happy with them, actually… But most of the time my wife does not share that sentiment. Plus they ache. Poor Wifey.

So, given how “classically pregnant” my wife is… The next few days should be interesting! I feel like a sneaky little kid hiding treats… It’s been a long time since I’ve kept a secret from my mother!

I’ll letcha know how it goes!

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6 responses to “Operation Pretend To Not Be Pregnant

  1. Kate says:

    I never got to enjoy the boobs either during wifey’s pregnancy haha. Good luck, it sure will be a nice present on Christmas morning Xo

  2. Lindsay says:

    Ohhhh boy! Maybe she can feign having the flu, since the symptoms are kinda similar?!

  3. DeCaf says:

    Shorty should pretend to have a cold or a stomach bug. Tired and pukey can be symptoms of both.

  4. Michaela says:

    You have to tell us how things went.

    Lool, really had to laugh at the boob comment. *giggle*

  5. I remember those achy boobs, she has my sympathy…I am sure however they find out they will be thrilled for both of you….

  6. If someone asks a out the boobs she can say shes put on pounds elsewhere, if asked about not drinking she. Ould say shes on a medication that you cannot drink with and makes her tired and nauseas. Ive already been using these when “possibly” pregnant around family. Lol good luck

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