Raising a Blended Family

“Hey moms!”

on August 10, 2011

Who here has seen that movie “The Kids Are Alright?”  Probably most of you, huh? Okay, so I admit it- I’m a bad lesbian (or maybe just an apathetic one) and we didn’t see that movie until very recently, despite its having been out for who-knows-how-long.  One of the things that struck me most about the movie was the way the children of the lesbian couple referred to their parents: “moms.”  As in, “moms aren’t going to like if you do that.”  A child of a straight couple would probably say “Mom and Dad won’t like it if you do that,”  so it makes sense that the children of a lesbian couple, would use “moms” as a perfectly natural substitute.  Believe it or not, watching the movie and hearing that phrase was the first time I’d heard it, ever!

Turns out though, I’m hearing the phrase a lot more often now lately.  T1, although she did not watch the movie with us, has taken to referring to us collectively as “moms”.  It tickles me pink.  She doesn’t do it often- I would say the majority of the time she still calls out “mommy,” regardless of which mom’s attention she actually wants… but there have been several times and they are growing in frequency when she will use the term “moms” to get our attention or when talking about us to somebody else.  I love it.  Besides the fact that it’s so damn cute to hear that little voice say “hey moms!”, it also gives me a sense of validation every time I hear her say it- yes, she accepts me, even though I’m the non-bio parent, yes, our family is whole and complete, no, T1 hasn’t picked up any “negative associations” with the way her family is structured- because if she had, she wouldn’t talk so openly with anyone and everyone about her “moms,” right?

I guess it’s silly. But I love it.

Oh, and also, I have a “you-know-you-live-in-a-household-that’s-TTC-when” story for you.  Brief, but amusing (to me at least):

You know you live in a household that’s trying to TTC when you come home with a box of Instead Cups because you’re about to start and you’re out of tampons and you’ve been meaning to try them anyways… and your partner looks at them and immediately says “Oh good, you got those for November right? (when we’re going to start again hopefully) Now we don’t have to buy them then- we plan ahead!”.  It was pretty funny when I informed Shorty that my purchase had nothing to do with TTC and everything to do with my period needs.  Amusing.

The end!


5 responses to ““Hey moms!”

  1. meridith says:

    We haven’t seen that movie yet! Bad lesbians FTW! We call ourselves moms when we talk to our daughter though, so i wouldn’t be surprised if she picks it up. When she can talk that is 😉

  2. we use that phrase since seeing that movie too (maybe the only redeeming point of the movie?!). i think it’s perfect 🙂

  3. X says:

    We haven’t seen it yet, either! FAIL!

  4. christina says:

    hi…just found your blog & enjoying it!! i still haven’t seen the movie by CHOICE…i don’t want to support a movie where a lesbian has an affair with a man! so typical…you didn’t mention that in your post…how was it?

    i do love the “moms” story…although we are still trying to figure out what our daughter will call us…

    • lezbemoms says:

      hey, welcome to the blog. Yeah, we saw the movie not actually knowing what it was about, just knowing that it was centered around a lesbian family. I was pretty “ugh” about the whole affair and movie in general… I think “moms” was my favorite part of the movie!

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