Raising a Blended Family

Adoption frustration

on February 12, 2011
By: C
So as you will learn if you keep reading this, A is the writer out of the two of us. It has taken me 5 minutes to just write this little bit. However, here we go anyways.
At the present time I guess I’m anxious and frustrated about the adoption part of having Thing 2. I hate the fact that we live in a backward ass country and that most places, including the state we live in, currently don’t recognize us as an engaged soon-to-be-married couple, let alone recognize the baby A will be carrying as mine.  Instead, we have to make plans to go through a lawyer and pay a ton of money for a second parent adoption, just so that I can say Thing 2 is mine and the world recognize that. With that being said, I will do what I have to do so that Thing 2 is legally mine, it just sucks that I have to jump through hoops and our country can’t get with the program and accept love for what it is- LOVE – and stop looking at the gender of the people involved.


3 responses to “Adoption frustration

  1. Michaela says:

    Oi, I know exactly what you feel. But, sorry that I have to say this, you can marry without having to pay a sentence of 36 000 Euros (because you have kids). You can have a second parent adoption even if it is expensive. We are not allowed to do so here at all.

    I know it’s maybe not the answer you were hoping for but I guess you could be off worse.

  2. lezbemoms says:

    We could definitely be worse off, and I do thank my lucky stars every day that at the very least, it is POSSIBLE for C to adopt Thing Two. We can’t marry actually, as it’s illegal in our state, but yes, we do have adoption. I think C was just expressing frustration and worry that maybe something will go wrong, and that, in spite of the law, somehow she won’t end up being legally recognized as Thing Two’s mom…

    Where do you live that they charge 36k euros to get married?

  3. Michaela says:

    Hm..all the laws suck. They should just make it normal (like marriage and so on)

    We are from Austria. They don’t charge for the marriage but you are not allowed to get married AND have children. You have to chose. So either you are in a registered relationship (don’t call it marriage) or you can have children (like a single mom). The law of the registered relationship prohibits that you have children, adopt them or..yeah, just now children.

    But….anyway. I can understand that frustration and I so hope that everything will improve. *sigh* It’s a stupid stupid STUPID thing to worry about. ooh…

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